Yesterday marked the Cromartie-th anniversary of the birth of the Greek God of C++ and Air Trainer 1s himself.
He invented the P90X workout.
He is both gentle and savage. He is never soft and always hard.
The skin on the back of his neck tastes salty, just like the skin on the back of his knee.
He IMs me every day to ask what I'm doing for lunch, even though he knows I am on a strict diet and I have to eat Lean Cuisines or a turkey sandwich or nine chicken nuggets.
This is just proof of how much of a gentleman he really is.
Happy Birthday Christian Figueroa. May God someday bless you with someone just like you, who likes to touch your butt like you touch mine.
BONUS:
This is a real, NON-photoshopped picture of him the last time we went to Stingaree. Do you like my cop costume?
Here is the frontal view. Chris posted this picture in the "What did you wear today?" thread on Niketalk. He isn't even wearing Nikes. Fail. As you can tell he's shy, he doesn't want to look into the camera. His butu is staring into the camera though:
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